Zumba : Stripper Moves Without The Pole

I was sitting at work, talking to a friend of mine, and I casually mentioned that I needed to start exercising more. Okay, scratch the word more from that last sentence and you now have a true statement. Just as soon as the words had left my mouth, her face lit up and she smiled.

Somehow I knew immediately that I was in trouble. She said "I have the perfect thing for you to start doing". I asked her what it was, and she said, "I do Zumba every Tuesday and Thursday night and you can join the class with me." She then assured me that it was an awesome class, filled with wonderful women, and that they were ALL women..because I had informed her that I could not exercise comfortably in a co-ed environment. It's just not what I do.

After a little consideration, and internal conversation, I decided to join the class. I put my yoga pants and t-shirt on, laced up my Nikes, filled my water bottle, and grabbed a floral perfumed hankie, just in case I should happen to work myself up to the glistening stage and I drove to class.

When I arrived everyone was smiling and talking and stretching so I joined them and after positioning myself in the far back corner, I began to stretch and smile as well...No problem...

Then...The music started. Let me just tell you that there was no warm-up. It was full blown cardio right off the rip, complete with hip thrusts, rotations, and suggestive dance moves that I feel sure were seen at the Gold Club during it's hey day.

I couldn't have been expected to do more gyrating than I did that night if I had been holding on to a stripper pole, wearing a catholic school girl uniform and sporting my brightest red lip gloss.

There were enough moves and dance routines going on in that room to make the Pussy Cat Dolls proud..

My hips hadn't moved like that in years and my thighs were begging for mercy. I most definitely had my workout on..and I meant to keep up or die trying....

Needless to say I was only about one or two songs in before I hit the glistening phase and had to pull out my hankie. I was blotting my neck with it, when one of the women said to me.."You should bring a towel." I thought to myself a towel? Woman I am not mopping my face up with a towel like some football player on the sidelines after a 70 yard run...it ain't happening....Of course, what I said out loud was "Thank you..I'll keep that in mind."

I am proud to say that I did manage to keep up and with all that was going on, the hour seemed to fly by, believe that or not. It ended and I had managed to survive it without the need for a 911 call being placed to have them dispatch EMS. I felt pretty good about that.

I did go back for the very next class and have continued to do so, because to be honest it is lots of fun and I actually enjoy it very much while I'm there.

I admit that the morning after each class does have a way of reminding me that this sort of repeated rhythmic gyration can cause a bit of discomfort...but it's not so much that I'll stop...I can't stop..If I do, how am I going to perfect my moves so that I'll be ready when I get the stripper pole I've ordered for my office...

Stripper pole??? you might ask....I am dangerous like that, but in this case...you can breathe easy..I'm only kidding about the pole order..I haven't completely lost it..I do realize that my pole dancing should remain in my imagination, and I am well aware that one just can't do random things like work a pole without caution these days.... I mean seriously people..There's YouTube...