"She's AWOL Lieutenant"

My husband has a job that places him in charge of a few people that not only listen to what he's saying most of the time, but also choose to comply. They call him Lieutenant. Understandably, this has led him to develop a certain sense of confidence in knowing, that when he gives an order it will be followed.

What he failed to understand one night, when giving a directive to our sixteen year old daughter, was, 1. She doesn't work under him, and 2. When you are a teenager some things just seem worth the risk. (like disobeying an order from your father for instance.)

On the particular night that I am referring to, he and I were sitting in our living room when our daughter, who hadn't gone to school that day, came strolling through. She had her hair rolled and had her make-up perfectly applied, lip gloss included.

My husband glanced up and saw her and casually asked , what are you doing? She responded ever so sweetly by saying "I'm getting ready to go to a party at Robby's house." My husband then informed her that she knew the rule. No school, no anything else.

She looked at him and said "You can't be serious! You have to let me go!" She then preceded to list all of the reasons that she would be socially ruined if she was unable to attend the party. He looked at her and said simply, "I'm sorry Lauren, but you're not going."

Needless to say, the water works began. She spouted off a few disgruntled comments, and stormed into her room. I heard her slam and lock her door, and then she turned her radio on loud enough for the neighbors to enjoy it with her.

After about fifteen minutes had passed, I told my husband that I thought he should go and check on her. He said "she's just mad. She'll cry herself to sleep and be over it in the morning." I told him that I just had a feeling, but he assured me that he had it under control.

Several minutes went by and the something's not right feeling kept gnawing at me. Finally I stood up and said "do what you want Lieutenant, I'm going to pick the lock." I grabbed a hair pin and popped the lock open on her door.

When I stepped into the room the first thing I saw was the curtain blowing in the breeze. I shouted into the other room saying "you might want to get up Lieutenant, you've got one awol."

The look on his face when he reached her room was one of total shock and disbelief . He couldn't wrap his mind around the fact that she actually had the audacity to not only go out the window, but to blatantly disregard what he had told her. I couldn't help but look at him and say "no problem, you've got this, right Lieutenant?"

While he was standing there trying to process it all, I went out to try and find her. My search was futile, so I had no choice, but to return to the house and wait for her. She came home right on curfew and through the front door acting as though there wasn't a problem.

She was placed on a few weeks restriction by her father, and just as a precautionary measure, her uncle and I nailed her screen onto her window. I did, however, being the good mother that I am, place a post-it note on the screen that read "in case of fire press hard!

Lauren must have learned her lesson, because it never happened again, but the real lessons that night may have been for the Lieutenant. Those lessons being that a mother's intuiton is a wonderful thing, and that if you aren't careful and you get over confident about your ability to handle your teenager, they can put stupid on you real quick...