"Suitcase"

My husband and I watched an episode of Everybody Loves Raymond that was about a suitcase sitting on the staircase of their home. Debra, the wife, wanted Raymond, the husband, to take it upstairs.

She felt as if she did everything as far as work in the house went, and the least he could do was bring the heavy suitcase, that he had used, upstairs, and so the stand off began.

I am telling you all of this so that you can understand what has been going on in my house lately.

My husband works nights and I work days, therefore, we sleep on different shifts. When I wake up the bed linens are still intact, but every afternoon when he wakes up the top sheet is completely off the bed.

A couple of weeks ago I came in and saw the sheet up in the bed in a pile and made an announcement. I said that I was sick and tired of having to put that sheet back on the bed because he rips it off everyday so that his feet can remain uncovered...

I said "I have asked you again and again to just stick your feet out from the side of the sheet like everyone else who wants their feet uncovered while they sleep, but you just can't seem to get on board with that idea"...

I told him that he obviously hated the sheet and that was fine. The next thing I did was pick it up and drop it on the bench that sits at the foot of our bed. I said "You win...No More top sheet, because I'm not putting it back on the bed EVER!!" (This was quite a big deal for me because I do love the feel of the sheets on my bed) I then looked at him and said "We've got ourselves a suitcase!"

Well he just grinned like it was all cute because he was thinking that I would cool down and make the bed later that evening. It's what I normally do. Well ...not this time. It was hard at first, but day after day I looked at that sheet and kept right on moving. When I washed the sheets I just folded that one and right back on the bench it went..after that, I didn't touch it.

Finally one evening he said to me "Victoria (our granddaughter) is spending the night tonight so you're going to have to put the sheet back on the bed".

Well...That just flew all over me. "Going to have to"? I looked at him and I said "are you serious right now?" As usual he was still grinning...I said only one word after that ...."SUITCASE"...

Finally one afternoon I came in and he was standing there as proud of himself as a four year old boy would be who had just cleaned his room. He said "I put the sheet back on the bed"...

I was thinking at that moment that I knew if I waited long enough his obessive compulsive disorder which causes his strong need to have everything in it's place would wear him down, but what I said was congratulations, that's great. I am glad that you took care of it.

Then as I turned to leave the room, I said by the way, about all of those wet towels on our bathroom floor... go in and take a look at them. You should recognize them, because that's exactly who they belong to, you....

I left him with a parting shot..."Suitcase"...when I came back into the bathroom later that same night the towels were all gone from the floor......

No more suitcases at my house for now... It seems, for the time being at least, my husband is traveling light......